Sometimes I feel like I can't control the feelings that are swirling around in my mind. Why can't I have an off button for my emotions and just stop thinking and feeling everything that is around me. I want to just sit back and not worry. But sadly, there is no such button, at least for me.
Then I think, that if one didn't go through all of those antsy, uncomfortable, annoying feelings that roll around in the pit of your stomach eating you alive, then how on earth would you know the moments that you feel like you're flying on a cloud, in the best mood of your life? I don't think it would be possible. You need to experience everything in life or you are never truly living. Living is like loving, you have to accept the good with the bad. If not, then you can't be living or loving at all.
It is hard missing someone you love. One of the most challenging feelings actually, but if you look at each and every day as one day closer to being with that person then life, even the hard times, becomes more manageable. It becomes a journey that can help you grow and find out exactly who you truly are. The person inside that rarely comes out into the real world.
I want to begin pulling little pieces of that person out each and every day. I want to reach down to my core and slowly pull another piece of broken colorful glass so that one day, when I put all of the tiny pieces together and create a wall of beautiful broken glass that doesn't seem so broken anymore.
And yes, of coarse I will miss a love, fail, an pass up on an opportunity, but I will make each and ever road block a time for reflection, love and forgiveness, because sometimes the person you have to forgive is the person staring right back at you, in the reflection of a mirror.
